You know how you meet someone and you aren’t really sure how they will fit into your life? There is a spark, something there, but you just aren’t sure where it will lead you. Sometimes you choose to go down the rabbit hole, sometimes you don’t. I know I’ve gone down the rabbit hole for all the wrong reasons and resisted for all the wrong reasons. I’ve been so scared in so many ways I don’t even care to remember and fear blurs your vision. I always believed that the heart knew, knew where people and opportunities fit in your life…but to listen to your heart takes courage. To go beyond your own fears, conceived ideas and nutcase beliefs takes courage, because it takes you beyond anything you’ve ever experienced. It also takes discipline, will and hell of a lot of guts to see reality for what it is. To continuously go beyond your beliefs and dare to see where you’ve moved away from your heart and created a personality and a life that has nothing to do with you, but that you may not be all that proud of, or intensely proud of. To let go of all that and embrace the truth takes balls. Given men have two and women have two (because boobs have just as much power as balls), we should be able to sort it out, right? But it is scary. And as you look back on mistakes and lost opportunities, suddenly embracing your aha moment of living from the heart, it doesn’t necessarily feel very encouraging, apart from the sensation that in the now, you are finally living, as you are. Connecting to the world as it is. You are potentially still petrified, but you are allowing yourself to feel and go down rabbit holes you’ve never gone down before.
“Why do you want to waste your energy on people and things that aren’t truly a part of you? Why do you want to reinforce your unworthiness by begging for love from those who don’t really love you? Why not let all the shaky stuff fall away and create space for what’s inherently connected to you, so you can rebuild on a solid foundation?” – William Whitecloud, The Magician’s Way