So I have been thinking all day about two very deep posts, consequently I’m too tired to write them. I promise that by tomorrow I will say something sensible again, but for today I intend to be ridiculous. You have been warned. Read on at your own risk – this is the curious case of a dizzy blonde…because apart from the deep shit, on my mind is a curious case of worries.
Recently I have been worrying thinking about how to convince my biz partner to set up our biz in Cali instead of NYC, which has exhausted me beyond belief for about three weeks now (every excuse from bikini butts to sea breeze have entered my mind, but mainly statistics about the population living here – I swear they are our perfect customers). I am seriously contemplating kidnapping him and locking him up at Wet Republic in Vegas for a few days (you ought to know your neighbors) and then drag him around all the beaches and clubs in LA for a week, or two. By the time I am done with sunshine, bikini butts and martinis I am sure he will have come to his delirious drunkenness senses. (Dear reader, don’t you worry – he knows me well enough to know that I will not retort to foul play and I will be where the biz is, so if it’s the moon – I’d only wish the moon would be part of Cali.) Another worrisome thing is that I have promised myself to send him the finished draft of everything for investors tonight. It will be a long night. Please do disturb me as much as possible to keep me awake – use your imagination for suitable disturbances.
Next worrisome thing on my mind is my frigging visa. As a foreigner you aren’t allowed to work outside campus (oh joy), so I can’t really afford to take a summer holiday unless I find work on campus, which if I do means I can’t do my unpaid internship over summer. If I don’t take a summer holiday though, my visa expires faster. Europeans reading this: I know you want to hire me for summer and pay me outrageous sums of money. I am available to highest bidding offer. Please live in a sunny spot, or hire me virtually. I’m good at everything, but a resume is available upon request.
Then there is this week’s camping trip coming up. I have spent hours trying to figure out how the Californians do camping. Sufficient to say: they think wilderness is owned by the government. In Sweden there is a law that nature is everyone’s right and you take your tent and go. Here there are laws and fees…not to mention bears. We are bringing a strong guy, but as most strong guys have nerves of melting butter, I bet it will be us women protecting him from the bears. *sigh*
Worst worry thus far: People keep telling me, after reading this blog, that I am the new Carrie Bradshaw. Although I am flattered to be likened to a woman in one of the top grossing TV shows of all time (that I have watched maybe 2 episodes of in total), I have to say that she and I are NOT alike. After watching the latest movie…kidnap me and gag me if I ever become her. And if my scripts are as boring as those two movies, it’s time to kidnap me again. Do not release me until I see sense. On the other hand – if you meet the dude that played the Dane that Samantha shags – you see sense and send him my way.
Dammit – I forgot: I also have to hand in a full-scale marketing plan for a movie on Monday and I have no frigging clue of what to wear to the MTV Movie Awards party…those problems are, however, almost pleasant.
What else? No more worries? I will then continue to sigh about the potentially unhappy love affair I am having with California. Maybe if I find a California investor who refuses to invest anywhere but in Cali? No one can resist investors. Investors: this way, please!!! Or someone give me a million! It would solve visa problems, biz problems and summer problems all in one go…the bears…well, maybe I can bribe them?… As for Carrie: with part of that million I could make a funnier movie than the last one…and if I don’t – gag me.
Wit makes its own welcome, and levels all distinctions. No dignity, no learning, no force of character, can make any stand against good wit. – Ralph Waldo Emerson (nor any problems…!!!)