Category Archives: Inspirational

Come hell or high water: poetic musings on life…

Here’s something that made me laugh. Out loud.

Are you someone who snorts horse tranquilizers? Didn’t think so. But if you’re trying to quit smoking, you may tell yourself that just one drag is OK. But you are not a smoker, just as you’re not someone who snorts horse tranquilizers. And someone who doesn’t snorts horse tranquilizers doesn’t sometimes have a whiff.  

This example, from Jen Sincero, made stop in my tracks. And laugh out loud.

Ever decided to turn your phone off when driving? I have. Which means I no longer check texts at traffic lights. But do you know how many times I thought to check texts at traffic lights when I first made this decision? And do you know how frustrating it is to sit there with nothing to do? 

I’m not a person who willfully causes accidents. Therefore, I’m not a person who checks my texts at traffic lights. That’s it. A decision is a decision. 

What’s helped me breaking this particular habit is audiobooks. It gives me something to think about while waiting for the lights to change. And when not busy listening to audiobooks, I play a game of looking around me to see how many details I can notice. As most of us drive the same roads every day without having a clue of what we’re actually seeing, this is a good exercise in observation.

Have you ever contemplated that you don’t even notice most of your life?

But back to audiobooks.

In general, audiobooks are helping me break a lot of habits. By filling my head with personal development books, I don’t have time to walk around thinking negative thoughts. I seriously recommend it for anyone prone to depression, or thoughts that don’t serve them in general. You can’t be depressed if you fill your head with thoughts that aren’t depressing and you can’t get stuck in unhealthy habits if you fill your head with healthy thoughts. And by infusing my brain with things such as how to make decisions that stick, I am implementing processes for a whole other life. 

When you make a decision to break a habit/enforce a new habit, think of it as you would snorting horse tranquilizers. If you don’t snort horse tranquilizers, you don’t sometimes do it, because, well, you’re not a horse tranquilizer snorter. And if you decide you’re a gym goer, or entrepreneur, or generally awesome person, then you do what they would do. As a gym goer, you go to the gym. That’s it. There’s no room for negotiation.

Decide who you are. Then act as that person.

I decided I’m an entrepreneur and filmmaker.

That’s why, last week I launched Magique on Etsy. After seven years of running around the globe, trying to “figure it out” I decided it was time to put one product on the market. Not all the product types I wanted to, but one. I don’t even have all the digital products I want on the market. That won’t happen till, well, I’ve had the time to create them all. For now, it’s mainly poetry prints. And I’m freaking out about it. Because OMG it’s not all the things Magique stands for. It doesn’t feel like a full representation of the brand. And OMG I’ve been working till midnight every night and I’m not making money from it RIGHT NOW. But what do you think derailed me from launching for seven years? The idea of perfection and needing cash right now, amongst other things.

I developed an entire product line (a physical one) that got massive praise and that I spent, literally, hundreds of hours developing together with a brand I spent another couple of hundreds of hours sweating over as I couldn’t pay for graphic designers to do it all. And the website. Another hundred hours (then I forgot to pay the damn domain fees and lost it all and now have to start from scratch. I learned WordPress for that site and let me tell you it’s not as easy as it sounds).

But did I launch? No. Just before doing it I always stopped. I didn’t have money to produce the physical products. I didn’t know how to operate the company with all the moving parts. If I broke it down, I didn’t know what product to start with. I traveled too much as I didn’t have a visa. All the stuff with the kids got in the way. I needed to make money RIGHT NOW. There was always something. And they were very valid somethings at times. They sounded like the perfect excuses. Anyone can understand that while you’re raising a kid with autism who’s smashing the furniture and trying to support golly know how many kids from a township while applying for visas you don’t have time to figure your business out. But I got my act together enough to start an Instagram account where I posted poetry related to the brand, as all our products come enchanted by words. And then I had this idea for digital products. And eventually I got the fuck on the fuck and launched the company on a full moon on Friday the 13th 2019. With six products.

Then I kept working.

Now there are more products.

I launched my business. Because I’m an entrepreneur.

And this morning, when wanting to go to the Cheesecake Factory and thinking about how long it will take till I get ot America…I decided to go to the local coffeeshop and buy cheesecake. Because I’m not someone who lives for delayed gratification. I’m someone who enjoys life.

Decide who you are. Then act on it.

I highly recommend: You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero. If you want to be a badass that is. If you want to sit on the couch/behind your office desk, bemoaning your life, then I highly recommend you do nothing.

In need of a last minute Christmas pressie? Or feel like buying one of my products and leave a review to support me on this journey of badassery? I’d appreciate it. I’d actually love it. So I’m giving everyone 65% off last minute Christmas gifts from Magique. As they’re digital downloads you can buy the download and print it at home, or at the local printers. If you buy something, send me a note so I can thank you for it.

This link will give you 65% off meaing some prints cost less than $3.50. https://www.etsy.com/shop/TheMagiqueBoutique?coupon=FRIENDS65

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Filed under Inspiration, Inspirational, Motivation, Poem, poetry, Uncategorized

No excuses…

No excuses. I think I’m going to frame this and hang it on the wall.

To all of us, life happens. We all deal with circumstance that’s less than ideal. Sometimes it’s downright horrifying. But don’t use that as an excuse. Instead of being weighed down by it, move beyond it.

If I wake up with the mindset that there are no excuses, I get excited. If I wake up worrying about things, I get depressed.

We can either worry and moan about the things that happen to us, or we can decide on what we want and go for that no matter what. Going for it will keep us motivated and taking action that serves us. Moping, moaning and worrying won’t.

We all have choice to be the best we can be and enjoy all life has to offer. But we also all have areas of our lives that are fucked five ways to Friday. We have the choice to change them for the better. But it’s usually not until we’re at the stage of do or die that we choose to change.

Personally, I am going to do everything in my power to power up my life. And that means no more excuses.

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Filed under Inspiration, Inspirational, Motivation, self help, Self-help

Go a little wild already — why acting like a cave woman is really the way to go…

Welcome to the pity party. It’s a certain kind of glorious celebration of all our flaws and misfortunes, where the champagne flows together with tears, complaints and general misery.

Here’s the deal. I don’t know about you, but I, myself, and several of my friends, acquaintances and even people I’ve overheard talking in general, have been known to complain.

For example, you know the person who’s terrible with finances, but would like to become a millionaire (that’d be me), yet have never picked up a book about mindset and money, nor about how to manage personal finances, nor gotten a budget app. The person who can’t keep a boyfriend for more than two weeks, but would like to get married, yet have never ever read a book about what healthy relationships are all about, engaged in personal development to learn about themselves, or gotten therapy. The wannabe entrepreneur who isn’t running a business (also me), who has never picked up a business book, nor takes steps towards launching their business. The person complaining about being fat/unfit, but who won’t eat healthily, nor exercise. The person wanting to be in excellent health, but who smokes all the time. The person who’d like a job they would enjoy more, but who is not educating themselves, nor trying to work their way up the company, nor looking for another job. The person who wants great sex, but have never told their partner they’d like to try something different, nor picked up a book about sex, or sensual pleasures. The person who is feeling like shit all the time and would like to get happy, but does not attend therapy, nor read personal development books, nor attend personal development courses. Possibly they also don’t eat well, nor exercise, nor sleep on regular hours, nor have a healthy social life, nor engage their brain in interesting tasks, nor practice meditation and mindfulness, nor spend time in nature. All which are scientifically proven to improve one’s mood. The person who’d like to live in a fancy mansion and always complains about their apartment, but have never ever tried to decorate the place better, or improve it in any other way.

In short, there are a lot of people who want certain things and complain about not having them. They also have excuses for why they don’t have them, be it excellent health, or smashing finances. It’s a matter of time. A matter of money. A matter of not having the education. A matter of it being too difficult. A matter of someone, or something, getting in the way. A matter of…whatever the heck it may be.

I have excuses for the areas in my life that aren’t what they couldn’t be. A lot of them. They aren’t so much excuses as they are reasons. I don’t have great financces, because I spent all my money trying to rescue a child with PDA from himself. Ways I thought I should live life. But one day you wake up and realize that unless you flush those reasons, those behavioral patterns and those “look what got in the way” down the drain, you’ll never live a better, happier, healthier, more financially secure, more pleasurable and more fun life. You can wave goodbye to your dreams, your hopes and your desires.

I’ve been filling my brain with personal development lately. I’ve also been really annoyed with some other people not getting their shit together. And by listening to personal development books and making certain distinctions, while studying other people’s patterns, I’ve also seen my own.

There’s always an excuse not to go after your dreams. There are always habits that will get in your way. There are always people who will get in your way. And there is always going to be shit happening that’s going to derail you for a while, or be annoying as F. But there is only one way of getting to where you want to be — do everything in your power to get there and stop at nothing.

If you spent one week, just one week, focusing on a goal you want to achieve, letting yourself be derailed by nothing, how far would you get? If you ignore the house that needs cleaning, the bills that need paying, the lawn that needs mowing, the Netflix movies that need watching, the… If you just focused on that one thing, how far would you get? And if it was a matter of your mother needing surgery and you finding the money in 24 hours, how far would you get? What lengths would you go to? When the stakes are high, we usually get very creative and resourceful. When we think we have till forever to get off our asses and do what we know we must, we usually don’t move.

Move. Run. Go.

Your life is now, not tomorrow.

And if you really want to get that guy naked — there are no excuses. Just act like a cave woman, club him down and drag him to your bedroom. If he doesn’t like it, you weren’t meant to be. Now you can start fantasizing about someone else. (This is a metaphor. Don’t club him down. Just whip his ass and tell him to get his clothes off. Pronto.)

Yours truly,

Dizzy Blonde — aspiring entrepreneur and millionaire

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Filed under achievement, diary, Goals, Humor, Insights, Inspiration, Inspirational, Motivation, Personal Development, personal growth, personal stories, success

If I can’t have you, I’ll have chocolate instead…

Have you ever had chocolate instead of sex? Oh come on, who hasn’t?! Or are you a chocolate virgin? If so, congrats. You’re the first I’ve ever met… 

Yesterday, I talked about relieving tension when we feel something uncomfortable — the urge to replace the discomfort by something else and, in the process, doing more harm than good as we aren’t dealing with the discomfort. We are putting a bandaid on a wound that needs surgery. It temporarily feels better, but the wound is only getting worse. 

But we also usually seek to relieve tension when we desire something we don’t have. Be it sex, intimacy, love, intellectual stimulation, etc. These are natural urges. All good in their own right. But how we relieve the tension when those urges aren’t fulfilled, isn’t always great. For example, you’re bored at work (you desire intellectual stimulation), but as you can’t have it as you need to finish the darn Excel file (never let me touch an Excel file), you check your Facebook. Other times, we have sex with one person, when we desire to be with another. We may also eat ice cream instead of having sex, or go for a run. Anything to distract ourselves from that burning desire.

Sometimes it’s good to relieve tension. When you’re sexually frustrated, going for a run isn’t a bad idea. It will help you get fitter. It will release feel-good chemicals. You’ll get your high. Eating a ton of ice cream, on the other hand, may not be so helpful. A long run and then a piece of chocolate, or a little bit of ice cream, is a better idea. (That said: there are days when a whole pint of ice cream is totally justified, depending on the brand of ice cream. If you’re eating shit ice cream it just won’t work.)

In the beginning of this year I met a friend of mine for coffee. I was upset. I felt like crying. I was mourning an acquaintance who’d committed suicide. A man I never got to know properly, because when he reached out to me, I was too scared to get to know him, even though I felt drawn to him. You see, in my mind various scenarios played out and I settled for the worst case scenario. 

He could be someone I’d get to know and nothing. No connection. 

He could be someone I’d get to know who’d become a friend. 

He could also be my soulmate. 

And he could be depressed and end up committing suicide, whether we have a connection or not. So it’s probably best I don’t go near him. Don’t explore him. I’ve created enough drama in my life as is. 

The week he committed suicide, I was planning to reach out to him about something. He died before I got around to doing it. And once again those scenarios were flashing through my mind. I felt a sense of regret I’ve never felt before. I felt sure God was making some sort of joke. That it was all wrong. That I’d wake up the next day and he’d still be alive and I’d talk to him to find out. Find out if we had a connection, or not. 

When I met with my friend in the coffee shop, feeling like an emotional wreck, he didn’t react at all like I’d expected. Simply, because I’d never expected him to say he was jealous of me. He was jealous that I felt something so strongly, because it’d been years since he’d done that. 

The other night, when I came home, I felt pain. This time about someone else. I didn’t want to feel that pain. I thought about speaking with one of my neighbors. I thought about talking to a friend. I thought about reading a book. I thought about doing an array of different things to distract myself from the pain. 

Then, as I was sitting on the toilet, because as we all know, that’s the perfect place to sit, I thought to myself: I’m feeling. This is what it means to be alive. And in that moment, the pain dispersed, because I allowed myself to feel it instead of holding onto it while fighting it. 

By that I don’t mean to say that all the sadness went away. It didn’t. I was told I looked like a wreck the next day. Always charming. But I was still ecstatic about life. I knew other experiences would follow. Good and bad. I knew I was alive, because I was feeling something. 

Life is a journey of ups and downs. Good and bad. Happy and sad. If we numb the bad stuff, we also numb the good stuff. And if we numb the bad stuff, it doesn’t go away. It just gets stuck somewhere and we have to keep numbing it. Keep fighting for it to stay away from the forefront of our mind. But by fighting we hold onto it.

Relieving tension can be good. The day after I was sad, I went to see a friend. Took in some rays. Sat by the beach, getting hugs. It was nice. It took my mind in different directions. Getting stuck reveling in something isn’t good. Be it sexual frustration, or the pain of losing a loved one. You need to purposefully focus your mind on things that move your life forward. 

In short, if you feel a strong desire, or pain, watch out what you do to relieve that tension. If you want to create a great love life, for example, it’s better joining an online dating site than fucking your neighbor. Fucking the neighbor will bring instant satisfaction, but you’ll wake up without a great love life the next morning. Joining a dating site may feel like a mission and bring no instant rewards, but in the end, it’s likely to take you closer to your goal. 

Lastly, sometimes it’s good to do nothing. Hang with the tension. The obvious path forward will reveal itself if you are just willing to wait for it. Stay with what you’re feeling until you find the obvious thing to do that will propel you in the direction of your dreams. That’s to say: the direction that will fulfill your desires and remove your pains. 

In short, if you can, hang with the tension without for that matter reveling in it. If you need to relieve the tension, think of good ways of doing so — ways that take you closer to your goals. If you can’t come up with any, put on a pair of jogging shoes and run for your life or do P90X till you want to kill Tony. Scrap that, you always want to kill Tony. Do it till Tony is killing your body. Then bliss out on chocolate. Or pasta. Or both. (And FYI it’s been scientifically proven that the ups and downs of love addiction, i.e. the highs and lows you have in a relationship, can be counteracted by exercise and carbs. And if it works for love, it must work for other things too.)

Yours truly,

Dizzy Blonde

No running shoes, no problem…

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Filed under addiction, Behavior, diary, emotions, empowerment, Happiness, Inspiration, Inspirational, Motivation, Musings, Thoughts

The fire within…

It doesn’t interest me what you’ve done wrong. What your sins, or twisted thoughts are. I don’t care if you’ve been to jail, or been involved with a gang. We’ve all made mistakes. All desired the wrong things. All fucked up miserably. At some point, we’ve all failed. Simply because we walked into life backwards somehow. Got the wrong end of the dick stick. Were conditioned to do things that didn’t serve ourselves and others. We were turned sour by life. 

And it doesn’t interest me what drugs you’ve taken to cope with it, or how much sex you’ve had to get through it. I don’t care if you’ve tried killing yourself, or ate till you couldn’t move. I don’t give a damn. So you weren’t given an instruction manual for life. None of us were. We all tried coping in different ways; some more successful than others. 

No, what interests me is what’s inside your soul. What makes you smile, even when no one is watching. What makes your heart come alive with wonder and your eyes widen in amazement. I want to know what turns you on in life; what quickens your heartbeat and sends shivers down your spine. 

I want to know your capacity for loving; how much love you have for your favorite passions and how much love you can give to another human. I want to see your willingness to serve another soul.

I want to know how much you’re willing to sacrifice to do the right thing. But I also want to know you don’t sacrifice so much you’re left wounded. 

I want to see your soul, naked and beautiful. 

I want to hear your heart beating with love. 

I want to know that the passion within you is still there. And I want to see it awaken, like a spark turning into a fire. I want to see you set ablaze. I want to see you burn with the beauty of all that you are. 

Yours truly,

Dizzy Blonde

P.S. This post was inspired by Oriah Mountain Dreamer’s The Invitation (as seen to the left on this page…while I don’t agree with all of it, most of that poem is brilliant), just as For my lover: an invitation… was.

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Filed under Inspiration, Inspirational, Love, Motivation, Self-confidence, Self-esteem, Self-help, self-worth, Soul, Spirituality, Uncategorized

Waiting to get turned on…

I had a chat with someone recently who is “waiting for inspiration.” Let me ask you this: do you sit on a couch waiting for a hard on? Because it’s kind of the same thing. 

To get inspired, you need to take action. Consider someone who is living off fast foods and is 100 kgs overweight and hasn’t exercised in two years. Will they feel inspired to exercise? No. They’re lethargic from their eating habits, because they’re malnourished, and carrying too much weight around which makes them tired. Even breathing is difficult, because they’re so unfit. Likely they are also depressed or the very least fatigued for the same reason — if you don’t get the nutrients you need, nor exercise your body, you end up depressed. It’s a medical fact.

They feel like shit, so they have another cookie. At least that gives them a temporary feel-good. Simultaneously, they loathe themselves for eating the cookie. So they want to hide away from others so they can’t see their shame. So they stay inside, having another cookie. Then they want to punish themselves for their own stupid behavior. So they have another cookie. 

This is what’s called a downward spiral — you’re caught in a negative pattern that only makes you feel worse and worse.  

It’s a bit of a catch-22 for these people. To have energy, you need to exercise, but to exercise you need energy. You will NOT be inspired to exercise. Unless, one day, you realize, you could actually have a life. All you need to do is get off the couch and get going. Or maybe you have such a fright you decide to get a life. Maybe you have a heart attack. Maybe you realize you’ll never see your kids/nieces/nephews/grandkids grow old if you don’t change. Or maybe you just realize you’ll never do anything you dreamed of while sitting on the couch, gaining weight by the hour.

We all feel uninspired by one part of our life, or another. Our finances. Our work. Our fitness level. Our eating habits. Our social life. Whatever it may be. Likely fears, unhelpful beliefs about ourselves/the world, feelings of inadequacy and a number of other things are making us feel uninspired. And sometimes we’re lucky — we have a moment of inspiration, whether fueled by fear of where we’re heading, or inspiration for where we might get to if we only get going. If we get off the couch.

I asked a friend of mine the other day what made he change his life around. He told me he almost died three times. Actually, once he did die. Went to the other side. Had a near death experience. Still, even with that, even with seeing the divine and simultaneously freaking out about dying, he told me it was hard to change. Very hard. He had to fight. But what got him through was his son’s voice. His son needed him. His son believed in him.

I’ve been depressed twice and twice I’ve had a moment when things shifted. When the road to recovery became obvious. The first time I was seventeen years old and didn’t even know what depression was. I just knew I slept a lot, I had very dark thoughts, I felt funny and I shook a lot. Like, I’d be shaking when out and about. I think my period stopped too. I didn’t know what it was. But my friends knew, spoke to one of my teachers and set an ultimatum: I had to get therapy or they’d seize to be my friends. They actually stopped speaking with me. The lot of them.

The day they told me that, I remember standing by a bus stop wondering how to break it to my father that my friends wanted me in therapy. I was ashamed. I thought mad people had therapy. I felt like I was a fuckup. Like it’s one thing to fail a dance competition, but to fail your life? I felt humiliated. I felt like a bad person. I felt all sorts of things. But I knew I’d fight. I knew I had to do something. And at that moment the sun burst through the clouds. Literally. And for the first time in months I felt something other than what I’d been feeling. Maybe it was hope. I don’t know. I just know that something shifted in that moment. I’d made a decision to get well.

Ten years later I got depressed again. I never cured the root cause of the depression in the first place. I improve my confidence and hence stepped out of the depression, but I wasn’t completely healed. When events in life led me to once again feel like I had no confidence, the depression came back. A relationship had gone tits up. My grandmother (a.k.a. the one source of unconditional love I had) had gotten senile. I’d started studying again and meeting new people I felt shy and awkward — I’d learnt to cope socially over the years, but meeting so many new people all I did was sit petrified, trying to figure out what they thought of me; too paralyzed by fear to speak. I couldn’t find my path career wise and I’d put most of my pride — most of my confidence — in my skills and talents. I was always the smart kid. The talented one. And I was what…doing fifteen weird jobs instead of making it as a world famous director; eventually going back to study out of pure desperation.

And those were the thoughts going round in my mind — I was a failure at everything.

Then I spent a day in Malibu with friends, standing on the beach, realizing I felt nothing. I was surrounded by beauty and felt fuck all. That was a feeling I had a couple of times a day/week and it scared me like crazy. I was much more scared of that feeling — of feeling like there was no meaning to life — than I was of pretty much any outside factor. In short, I was scared of myself, of my own feelings. And standing in Malibu surrounded by beauty and feeling nothing really made it hit home.

That night I sat in a hot tub under the moon praying to God/the Universe for an answer — I’d read all the books, tried everything to become successful and not a single area of my life seemed to be working. What should I do?

The answer came to me: my life was my own and I could do anything. I didn’t HAVE to achieve anything. I could just be.

Disappointment, defeat, and despair are the tools God uses to show us the way.

Paulo Coehlo

In that moment, my road to recovery begun once more. I learned to accept myself without having to do anything. The hole I’d felt inside of myself since I was a kid slowly started to disappear. I found confidence. By doing nothing.

I learned that I was my essence — my heart and soul — not my achievements.

Those were mine and my friend’s “sparks” — our moments of inspiration to turn our lives around.

I also believe you may find inspiration from faith. That if you truly believe you’ll be handed a moment of inspiration — a spark — then it will come to you. But you still have to engage your will for that to happen. You have to surrender to not knowing; to the idea that a path will be provided even if you can’t see it now. You have to believe you will find your spark. You have to pray every day. Have faith.

I also think you can change without that moment. It’s a decision. Engage your will. Sometimes outside events give you a reason — a source of inspiration — but you can just as well simply decide you’re going to do it.

So back to the story about the cookie man…

Even if you have that burst of enthusiasm, getting to a life where you’re no longer depressed and overweight takes engaging your will. You will need will to do this. That little burst of inspiration will not last forever. You will feel exhausted, not filled with enthusiasm when going for your daily run. You will feel bored by eating a salad instead of a cookie, because you won’t get a feel-good moment from the salad. (Just as when I was recovering from depression, I had to constantly work to shift my thoughts. I had many dark days and you feel like doing fuck all those days, or you simply don’t know how the hell to get through them. But I kept going. Until feeling good became more normal than feeling bad.)

That’s why acting from principle (I will do whatever it takes to live a healthy life) is a lot better than acting from feeling (I feel like shit, so I won’t move — I don’t feel like I deserve a life, so I won’t move — I am tired, I deserve a break).

That’s also why having a support network — people who show up to hold you accountable to exercise and eating healthily — is so important. Because if you don’t “feel” like moving, they’ll make sure you do so. And if they can’t make you, they’ll send you to a wellness retreat in the mountains where they’ll force you to do so. Structure has integrity — if you can’t change the structure in your life (your habits), then hire someone who will. Or put yourself in a place, such as a health retreat, where they force you to.

However, as your lifestyle improves, over time, so will your mood, your body and your inspiration. Changing your habits will lead to you becoming inspired. But it won’t happen over night. It takes time. It takes discipline. It takes some fucking will to get off that couch and decide you deserve a happy life. And you do. Deserve a happy life. We all do.  

Remember that: you are a beautiful soul. Even if you’ve lost your way in one area, or all areas of life. You can still find your way back to your heart and soul. The essence of your being. You just need will.

Think about it this way: you may need some whips and chains to take you to the strawberries and champagne. Not all pain is bad. Not all discipline is bad. So welcome the torture. It will lead to pleasure.

Do yourself a favor: if you want a hard on, go out and date someone who gives you one. Or, you know, give someone a booty call. Don’t stay on the couch waiting for it to happen. It won’t.

Inspiration comes by doing. The more you do, the more inspired you’ll become.

Yours truly, dizzy blonde. 

I get up in the evenin’
And I ain’t got nothin’ to say
I come home in the mornin’
I go to bed feelin’ the same way
I ain’t nothin’ but tired
Man, I’m just tired and bored with myself
Hey there, baby, I could use just a little help

You can’t start a fire
You can’t start a fire without a spark

Bruce Springsteen

I learned that the search for God is a Dark night, that Faith is a Dark Night. And that’s hardly a surprise really, because for us each day is a dark night. None of us knows what might happen even the next minute, and yet still we go forward. Because we trust. Because we have Faith.

Paulo Coelho

And if you missed yesterday’s blog:

You’re a beautiful soul you know. You sparkle and glitter. You’ve got kindness and love twinkling away in your heart. Maybe you’ve fallen on the ground a couple of times. Maybe you’re still lying on the ground. Maybe you can’t get up…maybe you’re crawling. But you’re still beautiful. You have gold speckles covering your body. Divinity floating about you in a cloud. Maybe you can’t access that right now. Maybe your mind is broken. Maybe your body too. But your heart and soul are intact. They always will be. You just need to find your way back to them if your life currently isn’t true to them. If your life is not a reflection of who you truly are deep inside. Allow yourself to recognize that you are love. You are divine. You’re no less, no more, than the person next to you. Life shaped you one way or another. That’s all. Inside of you are still all the wonders of the world and some. You’re beautiful. And maybe I’m not great at telling you that, because, well, I’m more prone to kick your ass, but I still see you, you know. I see the miracle that is you. And that’s why I’m here. Not because you’re broken, but because you’re whole. Because you are a heart and a soul. All the rest is just the topping. Continue reading…

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Filed under depression, diary, emotions, Inspiration, Inspirational, Motivation

How to have fun with a butt, a camera and a bit of humor…

It’s been said that the quality of our life is proportional to the quality of questions we ask ourselves. 

Have a look at these questions, for example:

  • How did I become a failure? 
  • What can I do today to achieve something small today?  
  • Why am I such an idiot that I’ve allowed myself to become so unfit I can’t even climb a set of stairs without panting like a dog?
  • What’s one thing I can do every day to improve my health? 
  • Why is life boring?
  • What can I do to infuse my life with passion? 
  • Why is depression so difficult to deal with?
  • What can I do to deal with my depression?
  • Why is my husband so incredibly boring?
  • What can I do to spice up my relationship? 
  • My boss is so unfair, why do I need to have a boss like him?
  • What can I do to make my life at work better? And if I can’t, where can I find a better job? 
  • Why do I never go to the gym?
  • What’s an exercise I can do at home every day that I know I can handle doing and have the time for? OR What friend of mine can join me in an exercise challenge, ensuring I show up when I said I would?
  • Why did Mandela die and leave South Africa in such a mess?
  • What can I do to improve South Africa today?
  • Why are people bitches?
  • What can I do to spread kindness? What’s a random act of kindness I can perform today? (Kindness, as we all know, is contagious.)
  • Why are my orgasms so short?
  • What do people do to have longer orgasms?
  • Why do I keep making a mess?
  • What’s one action I can take to make things tidier?
  • Why am I feeling so listless and lazy?
  • What do people do to invigorate themselves/feeling awake that actually makes them feel good about being alive?
  • Why don’t I have the money to launch my $1M venture?
  • How can I start a business with $1 in three weeks?
  • Why aren’t I having fun?
  • What can I do to have some bloody marvelous good times?

First of all, ask questions about things you can do something about. You can’t control others, so control yourself instead.

Secondly, ask questions that move you forward, instead of burying you in a bunch of undesirable thoughts. 

So, what are you asking yourself today? Me? I’m going to ask myself…what can I do, one tiny — really tiny — action, every day/week to improve a number of different areas of my life. Because I’ve learned that those tiny actions eventually lead to big results. 40 situps a day (or 10 situps, four times a day) are 280 situps a week, 1120 situps a month. 100 situps a day that aren’t done, are 0 situps a week, 0 situps a month. Or a 1-hour workout a day that there isn’t time for, is zero workouts a day. 15-minute workouts every day, well, they add up. You can do the whole of Ab Ripper X in that time. That’s 275 bloody ab exercises. IN 15-MINUTES. The next day you do 275 leg/butt exercises, the day after that 275 arm/upper body exercises, the day after that 15-minutes worth of high-impact cardio. For me, this works. 1-hour workouts? Don’t have the time apart form my weekly dance class.

When I try to do too much, too soon, it doesn’t work out. When I do a little bit a day, it works.

Oh and I’m totally googling how to have longer orgasms.

So what questions are you gonna ask yourself today that change your life?

Dizzy blonde, over and out. 

People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can’t find them, make them.

George Bernard Shaw

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